When I Close My Eyes Tonight

When I close my eyes at night, I drift into an imaginary space. A space which doesn’t constantly stay the same. Some nights I’m in a cozy loft with warm tones and neutral coloured furniture. Other nights I am in a hotel with a balcony view of the Eiffel Tower because ‘a girl can always dream’.

Before I sleep, I swing back into a child mood and play pretend. Except this time, it does not involve Barbie dolls and I sometimes wish for it to come true. I dream about my future and what could potentially be mine someday. Somedays I pretend to be a successful corporate woman who has reached the top of the ladder and other days I choose to dream about having a humble life with my partner-to-be.

Sometimes I get flashes of good memories that replay in my head. It dates back all the way to the past, as far as I can possibly remember. Sometimes the same scene gets replayed again and again in my head and I become my very own 3rd person viewing things from the outside.

Flashes of bad memories surface once in a while and I try to learn what I can from that episodes. I’ve been very blessed to be surrounded by people who loves me wholeheartedly for who I am and I thank my lucky stars bad memories are sparse and few.

the-nat-channel-sunset-dreamer

I dream a little, think a little, analyze a little more.

I am thankful for all the small and big things that happened in 2016. I will forever be grateful for having a home, a loving family and the best bunch of friends I could possibly have. Anything extra is a bonus.

I am thankful for having a full-time job amidst the unpredictable economic situation. Grateful to not have to worry about bills, rent, loan and other financial commitments. While materialistic, I have not lost my sensible mind which could possibly lead my finances to spiral out of control. And for that, I have to give myself a pat on the back for still staying grounded.

I’m not one who sets New Year Resolutions because I know how forgetful I can get. I prefer to work on things on a day by day basis. Perfecting myself as a person and improving myself when I can.

When I close my eyes tonight, I’ll be waking up to a brand new year, a brand new start.

Cheers to new beginnings, Happy New Year!

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